Off Roading Near Bastrop, TX

In the middle of a massive road trip from Los Angeles to Milwaukee to Austin to Los Angeles. Picking up some gear back home and visiting Tina's folks in Texas. We got ourselves a beautiful 70 degree day, and since we finally got our fixed off roaders - aka Summoners Of Blackened Vomits - back from Milwaukee we thought it best to go get filthy. Found this ROCKY HILL BIKE RANCH near Smithville (yes the same town you're thinking of where they shot the film Hope Floats with America's Sweetheart and Infector Of Suburban Mom Hairstyles, Sandra Bullock). Just got a bunch of rain so the trails were real wet, and trails had names like "Frontal Lobotomy", "Fat Chuck's Demise", "Hard Boil", and "Omar's Howl". No brakes, holiday snackin' gone wild, trucker butt, and stiff legs made us take it a little easier. Still lots of climbing though, but the views were worth it. Too bad the trailhead bar was closed. Why isn't that the norm for trailheads?