April 4, 2012

Knock it Off

Here's a huge pet peeve of mine. You've seen this at every Homey Fall Fest, anywhere a bunch of single speed mtb'ers can be found.

flaskholder2_list_main_conv

You see, normally it'd be a water bottle holder, but it's not. It's for a flask, because you know, I want you to think that I drink. Get it?

A real drinker (someone who can hold their shit) has no need to be showy about it, and they understand that flasks go in your back pocket.

The only reason to have one mounted on your bike is to impress others and the only thing it will get you is your whiskey drank up by people who aren't you.

So stupid. Take your Fox jersey and your flask holder and fuck off someplace.

16 comments:

Chris Clappe said...

fucking hilarious!

pookums said...

I have a Fargo so I have SIX of these fuckers on the frame and fork alone.

Anonymous said...

hey man, no need to drag the homey into this.

Death Rider said...

fuck yeah! Thanks for pointing this out.

mark$ter said...

SO I guess I'm gonna stop riding around with Baked Beans in my bottle cages. I just wanted to meet other people like me.

Anonymous said...

Whoa where are the positive vibrations man?

Anonymous said...

Knock it off? I thought this was the next OTS All City project.

Anonymous said...

As long as they're cute I don't give a shit if they drink my booze. Really. Flasks in your pocket, fail.

gmoore3181 said...

Hear Hear...

I'll drink to that.

Anonymous said...

words of wisdom

BLITZKRAIG said...

This "column" has some potential.

Anonymous said...

is this really worth letting everybody know about? who cares.

J.R. Hunter said...

I have a flask holder on my snowbike and...I might even have a fox jersey! I own that $hit...

Anonymous said...

Your version of Amerika is stupid

rdrey said...

Personally, I found this post to be HILARIOUS. And Mark's baked beans comment too. Sounds like there's a lot of self-conscious flask riders out there. Keep up the good work. I love this blog because of it's real opinions and original content B^|.

curlybro said...

Yes, my favorite temperature for whiskey is 100 degrees after I've been riding around with it in my back pocket all day.